New Year Reflections!

Another year coming to an end! When I look back it feels like its been a mixed bag. The good with the not so good, the happy with the sad, the highs with the lows and many more such contrasts that usually are a part of the thing we call LIFE.

Its strange how when I begin to write I feel like I have a lot to say or share but often whilst in the process of doing so words just elude me. Either there is so much there that I dont know how to go about it or then I know exactly what I want to say but 'words dont come easy'.

For starters, this year has whizzed past. 'Time flies' somehow came alive when it came to 2011. So much happened in one year but at the end of the year, when I sit to recall all that transpired, my mind draws a blank. For me the recent few events stand out. The earlier ones seem like a blur.

At the end of a year I try and look at what I have achieved, more in terms of self growth. Its like when you started out, there was a mental list of things that you knew you need to work on and somewhere you put in all the necessary efforts to do that. Sometimes it works , sometimes you know you achieved part of it and you still need to work harder. But to me the most outstanding moments are the ones where things just happen which make you do stuff in an spontaneous manner and in those moments lie some of your own biggest breakthroughs, even though you did not set out to achieve that for yourself! Often you dont even realise that those aspects needed some working upon or polishing or changing. So in hindsight, to me those were the best happenings. And there is also so much that you learn about life or the workings of the universe through these events.

In this year life gave me a lot to both work upon and also reflect upon. And what stands out after all that is something that I will try to put into words so its also a reminder for me about what I have learnt and all that needs to stay! Some beliefs I had, got strengthened and reinforced, and some that I had not even thought about got imbibed. The way I have seen and experienced life in general, I have seen that 'the more you persist, the more it resists, and the more you resist the more it persists'! This is a mighty profound statement from whatever I have seen and understood in my own life and to me nothing else seems more true. The more you go after something the more it eludes you and the more you run away from something, the more it comes after you!

Another one is the fact that there definitely is a 'time' for everything and try as hard as you want if the time is not right or just 'not yet', it does not happen. This may sound fatalistic but atleast I feel it is true. For those who believe in destiny, that too may have a part to play here. And if I have to highlight this, the best eg would be that you try very hard and leave no stone unturned for certain things to happen, but they still dont! So there has to be something else operating here, a different plan, a bigger plan, a better time, or a combination of all these and other factors or then something else altogether.

Then there is something that I learnt about "healing"! If there is anything that heals that too in the most effective manner , its only TIME! Other things may help to some extent or facilitate the process of healing but its time alone that does the trick! And its self defeating to force or speed up the healing process, whether the healing is in relation to people, relationships, events , memories, grieving, or anything that truly requires to be healed! You need to let it happen naturally and its own time.

Something that I did not or could not believe in earlier was that if there is something wrong in your relationship with someone who truly matters to you, if you give it love and positive vibes from your end it will only change for the better. To me this was too idealistic and I always said 'easier said than done'! But overtime I decided to give it a shot and now I can say quite confidently that if at all thats the only thing that works. Nothing else does! It takes time and a good amount of patience is required as well but it does something miraculous in the end! I am truly amazed with how it works. Its very tough to do this if u feel hurt or pain but it requires baby steps, and a lot of faith and persistence. And its very tempting to give up when u dont see the results when you want to see them, but thats exactly when you need to hang in there just a little longer. There comes a time and a point in your own life when you just cannot carry on feeling bitter, sad, hurt or angry with someone or something. They did what they did but when you realise that its 'you' who is carrying the baggage, thats when you realise and tell yourself that it will have to be "you" alone who needs to shed that baggage! At the end of it all you need to travel light and it feels so much better! You let go, you forgive even if u cannot forget. The latter will happen when its meant to.

Something related or connected is the fact that you cannot change anyone, neither can you change their thoughts or feelings about anything. You may want to do that in many cases especially when you can see something that the other one cannot and that person may be dear enough which is why you hope that they can see it. But you need to and will have to take solace in the fact that if they are meant to see it they will but you cannot decide how and when that will happen. And yet again if they are not meant to, you just have to do your bit in whichever way and surrender and let go of the situation very gracefully and ideally without expectation even though thats a tough one! Its only human to expect but with all the experience you know better even if you cannot implement it right away. The awareness is a good starting point!

And last but not the least is something that is very close to my heart. Some people just walk into your life by default or by a stroke of fate or destiny and sometimes the relationships that you have with them are the best and most beautiful. They maybe part of your life in any capacity but what they bring along with themseleves is truly inspring, enriching or if I have to put in simple words, then they bring some sunshine into your life along with bringing a smile on your face! These people and relationships just happen, without you doing anything and thats when you realise how some things are just meant to be and that the universe does some really wonderful things which are beyond the human intellect and understanding. The more you actually believe in these, the more they will happen for you and if you do not you might just miss out on some lovely events and occurences that life has in store for you.

And to sum up, wishing a lot of pleasant times ahead in 2012 for everyone and may Faith and Hope supercede everything else! And if by any chance there is any truth to the whole bit about the world ending in 2012 then all the more reason to do everything that is on our bucket list and make sure we live it up before we pop it :)